My absence here has been deeply felt...but I have not let my faith slip these last two weeks, because I have been doing the Lord's work.
By making money.
I unexpectedly found a temporary legal job in downtown Chicago on a document review project and, after consultation with my hubby, decided to take it. He took a few days off work. Two sisters-in-law and a brother-in-law pitched in to help out. I have been getting the kiddies off to school in the morning, leaving about 9am after a relative comes by to baby-sit, starting work at 10am, then punching out at 6:30pm and heading for home.
I miss my little ones.
They are doing just peachy though. My almost 2 year old especially seems to enjoy having different people around each day and a variety of fun things to do, like outings with Daddy and playing with her 2 week older cousin when that sis-in-law comes to babysit. My 4 year old son is happy to have so much computer and electronic game time (I am not limiting it while I am gone so much). My big kids are really pitching in to help. My husband is really picking up the slack.
But this will not continue.
Despite my occasional stay-at-home mom fantasies about skipping off to work at a posh office, the reality is not nearly so glamorous. The law firm I am working at on the 23rd floor of a Chicago high-rise is gorgeous, with ivory marble walls and floors and frosted glass partitions everywhere.
All I can think of is Jesus talking about "white-washed tombs."
Most of the people working there seem either annoyed or cranky or just desperate and lonely. I see junior associates in front of computer screens, not talking to anyone, for HOURS on end. The place just feels "dead" to me. A money-making, soul-sucking factory.
I can't wait to take my money and run.....run back...
to being the mommy who makes my baby smile and dance when I walk in the room;
to being the mommy who makes healthy, delicious dinners we all sit down to at 6pm to eat and share our day;
to being the mommy and wife who keeps this busy ship of 6 children smoothly sailing so that when my hubby walks through the door in the evening, he can just enjoy the love!
I took this job to make money to prove to my hubby that God will always provide for us, that I am willing to do the hard work needed to keep the family "in the black", to show that the adoption I am praying he will agree to IS financially possible...
but what I really did is prove to myself that being a wife and mother is the BEST job in the world, and I want to keep it, and keep working at it, for a very very very very very long time!